Good GRIEF: It is okay to be selfish and don’t apologize for it.

Let me just start off by saying widowhood is a hood I had no intentions of journeying through for at least 50 more years.

I’ve been on this journey for coming up on 6 months….and I’ve survived 100 % of my worst day!

The days have flown and also drug on….. Some days it’s unbearable and other days I feel “okay” with accepting he is with Jesus. After all, that is the goal.

I’ve learned that it is OKAY to be selfish with your energy, mental state, time, children, and life. PERIOD. I’m in full blown protective mode for me and my kids. It is okay to be selective. People will absolutely judge you. Let that go. Other people will respect you and commend you. Those are your people! A little insight: Most days, I have just enough energy to get my oldest off to school and take care of the youngest through out the day. Then we crash at bedtime… Some days, I only have the energy to shower. I don’t say that to imply I need help, but to further educate anyone who needs it. As a widow, we are in fact in survival mode. Let me say it louder….. SURVIVAL MODE……I fully understand that other lives were effected by the loss of my husband, I get that. It sucks. Mine and my children’s lives changed very drastically. The person that was my absolute best friend, helped with our kiddos, calmed me when I need it, comforted me, loved me through all aspects of life, , kept me laughing, provided for us, and completed us, was stripped away from us quicker than you can blink. Seriously, think of how much your life would change if your spouse tragically died. Sit with that for a moment.

Thank you to those that understand and respect that I am here, but also not here. Elizabeth is all tapped out on most stuff and will be for a while.